I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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