bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Randomize