Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
