just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
