You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize