im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize