"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
