Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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