Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
