It's just like the Real World with babies
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
