the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
