The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize
