It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
