About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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