I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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