I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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