I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize