Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
