We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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