She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
