I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
love makes seman taste better
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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