No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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