she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize