Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
