No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
