Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
