every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize