My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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