Buhtt sex?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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