dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Randomize
