can we get nightvision for the apartment?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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