she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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