Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
