Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Randomize
