my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
