He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
