but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize