Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
