Do vagina's smell?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
A+ Viking dick
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