somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
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Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
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There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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