she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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