i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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