you turned your livingroom into a bong?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize