Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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