I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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