Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
