she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
