My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
kristin has been a bad kristin
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
My feet surprised me
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
