i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
