Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize