I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize